Snow White and the Huntsman

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In all honesty, I had rejected this movie in my mind prior to going into it.

Snow White is not some warrior in shining armor leading an army. She’s not. Snow White wears that blue and red and yellow taffeta dress with the poofy freaking shoulders and when she’s not hanging with her dwarfish friends or chowing apples, she sings to birds. Ok? That’s Snow White.

So perhaps this is all overreaction to my complete underestimation of it, but “Snow White and the Huntsman” was an excellent, highly entertaining movie. More than just a retelling of the Snow White tale, it’s an epic fantasy story, replete with mythical creatures, knights in armor, a princess in a tower and a very, very wicked witch.

I don’t know if it’s the fairest of them all, but it’s easily worth a trip to the movies.

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Piranha 3DD

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Here’s the best thing about Piranha 3DD.

It practically comes with a warning label.

Between the title and that poster it is absolutely scaring away or driving off any people who would potentially… I dont know, stagger into the theatre by accident. I don’t see any old ladies taking way too long to buy a ticket staring at the showtime listings asking the cashier “W-what’s that Piranha 3DD about?” I don’t see any families with young kids with little Billy saying excitedly, “Mommy, Mommy, Piranha 3DD!! Piranha 3DD!!” and then the mom answering, “Is that what you want to see? Oh ok…” LOL

No, between the marketing and the previous movie, I do believe that the only people who will check this movie out are people who will enjoy seeing a CGI Piranha chomp onto someone’s penis, or enjoy slow motion silicone shaking shots, or get a kick out of David Hasslehoff mocking himself.  

If you’re one of those people? “Piranha 3DD” is the movie for you.

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For Your Consideration: Best Community Builder

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Normally on Fridays, I like to run my “Follow Fridays” series, where I recommend another movie blog and try to briefly explain why they’re worth checking out. It’s one of the ways that I try to connect everyone, and also a way to try to support other blogger’s efforts.

So I thought today would be a good day to launch my Lammy campaigning, and lead with the category “Best Community Builder / Networking Lamb”. It kind of ties in neatly to what I’d be doing today anyways.

I think everyone here knows that here at FMR we have a great movie discussion/commenting community, but you might not all be familiar with all of the other candidates. This post will give me an opportunity to highlight the other nominees, which will be good for our Non-Lammie readers and help our eligible voter friends have a look at the category and make an informed decision…

For FMR, of course! :D Read on!

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The Top Ten Ridley Scott Films.

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In all honesty, I never wanted to do “Top Ten” lists here.

I’ve never read one that didn’t piss me off somehow, and frankly, who am I to authoritatively rank anything? AFI, I am not.

But I have to acknowledge that they’re an extremely popular post format, and going through them can actually be an interesting exercise. For example, as familiar as I am with Sir Ridley’s filmography, I found myself rewatching 3 different films in order to compile this list.

So here we go, our first top ten list here. The top ten films of Sir Ridley Scott.

I’m well on the record here as being a big fan of the man, he’s a great director with a handful of true classics under his belt and a filmography full of solid movies. You can always count on his movies to be visually appealing, and more often than not they’re lavish productions that can transport the viewer to a different place, or time, or even world.

That’s what the magic of movies is all about.

Click through to check out what I feel are his ten best!

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New Episode of The (title pending) Movie Podcast with Tank and Fogs!!

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What’s going on everyone?

Here’s a new episode of the Lammy Nominated (title pending) Movie Podcast with Tank and Fogs!! :D

Yup. The (title pending) Movie Podcast has been nominated for a 2012 Lammy for “Best Podcast” by the Large Association of Movie Blogs. LOL How sweet is that?

And I’ll tell you what, you listen to this episode, and you’re gonna know WHY in about ten seconds. LOL!!! Seriously. Tanski’s gone off the deep end a little… I’m just… watching the man work. It is… somethin’. Dont drive and listen, be sure you’re sitting down, don’t be drinking anything… ok? You’ve been warned. :D

The Tanker and I review “Men in Black: III” and get into quite a squabble over it. We also go over “Chernobyl Diaries”, although we see much more eye to eye on that one. (Where’s the fun in that?) Then, in our feature discussion, we talk about the career of one Will Smith. That’s right, the Fresh Prince himself, Big Willie Style.

You can download this episode directly, here. Or as always, look for us on iTunes!! If you do, please be sure to leave us a review! If you’d like to keep up with all the goings on in the (title pending)-verse, you can give us a like on our Facebook page here!

Enjoy this episode, I cant wait to hear the feedback on this one…. :D

Tossin’ It Out There: What’s YOUR Favorite War Movie?

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Seeing as this weekend was Memorial Day, I thought this would be a good week to turn our discussion to War Movies.

War is a frequent topic for Hollywood. So much so that the movies are their own genre. Whether it be military biopics such as this weekend’s MTESS “Patton” or “MacArthur”, attempts to recreate the battles and notable moments of wars such as “The Longest Day” or “Tora! Tora! Tora!”, or straight up fiction set within a historical conflict such as “Apocalypse Now” or “Full Metal Jacket”… Hollywood has gone to the war well often.

It makes for epic storytelling. There’s conflict and danger inherent in the setting. Heroes and villains. Just recreating a war lends itself to great filmmaking. Getting any measure of believability onscreen requires tremendous production values. The stories tend to be epic as well. Not that there havent been plenty of misfires, of course…

So what’s YOUR favorite war movie? Which movies do you find yourself sitting through any time these holiday weekend war movie marathons pop up? Let us hear it!

Be forewarned, though, today the judges are feeling very strict. So no screwing around in court. Star Wars is NOT a WAR movie. Stay on point!

Chernobyl Diaries

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Just over 25 years ago, one of the reactors at the Chernobyl nuclear power plant suffered a meltdown. It was the worst disaster in the history of nuclear power. Four hundred times more radioactive material was released than at Hiroshima. It is difficult to estimate the actual deaths indirectly attributable to the incident, or the impact on health and life. At the very least, several hundred direct deaths have been confirmed, and it was a crippling blow to the Russian economy.

Approximately 135,000 people had to be evacuated from the surrounding areas. An uninhabited zone with a 20 mile radius known as the “zone of alienation” surrounds the concrete and lead sarcophagus that nuclear officials constructed on the site in order to contain the radiation. It has been estimated that this zone will be unsafe for human habitation for 20,000 years.

“Chernobyl Diaries” has the gall to create a horror movie about young people who recklessly sight-see this area… as if we wouldn’t want to see them killed.

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Movies That Everyone Should See: “Patton”

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“Be seated.

I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.

Men, all this stuff you’ve heard about America not wanting to fight, wanting to stay out of the war, is a lot of horse dung. Americans, traditionally, love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle.

When you were kids, you all admired the champion marble shooter, the fastest runner, the big league ball players, the toughest boxers. Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Americans play to win all the time. Now, I wouldn’t give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That’s why Americans have never lost and will never lose a war. Because the very thought of losing is hateful to Americans.

Now, an army is a team. It lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team. This individuality stuff is a bunch of crap. The bilious bastards who wrote that stuff about individuality for the Saturday Evening Post don’t know anything more about real battle than they do about fornicating.

Now, we have the finest food and equipment, the best spirit, and the best men in the world. You know, by God, I actually pity those poor bastards we’re going up against. By God, I do. We’re not just going to shoot the bastards. We’re going to cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks. We’re going to murder those lousy Hun bastards by the bushel.

Now, some of you boys, I know, are wondering whether or not you’ll chicken-out under fire. Don’t worry about it. I can assure you that you will all do your duty. The Nazis are the enemy. Wade into them. Spill their blood. Shoot them in the belly. When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before was your best friend’s face, you’ll know what to do.

Now there’s another thing I want you to remember. I don’t want to get any messages saying that we are holding our position. We’re not holding anything. Let the Hun do that. We are advancing constantly and we’re not interested in holding onto anything — except the enemy. We’re going to hold onto him by the nose, and we’re gonna kick him in the ass. We’re gonna kick the hell out of him all the time, and we’re gonna go through him like crap through a goose!

Now, there’s one thing that you men will be able to say when you get back home, and you may thank God for it. Thirty years from now when you’re sitting around your fireside with your grandson on your knee, and he asks you, ‘What did you do in the great World War II?’ you won’t have to say, ‘Well, I shoveled shit in Louisiana.’

Alright now you sons-of-bitches, you know how I feel.

Oh, I will be proud to lead you wonderful guys into battle anytime, anywhere.

That’s all.”

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Men in Black III

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The Men in Black are back, and they’re up to their old tricks. Battling aliens, zapping people’s memories, and having witty exchanges between one another. The Earth is imperiled, and this time in order to save it, Agent J (Will Smith) has to travel back in time to work with the young Agent K (Josh Brolin).

For people who are fans of the first two, this movie should deliver what you’re expecting – it’s pretty much a healthy dose of “More of the Same”.

It sets the bar for itself low, jumps over it easily, and then happily accepts the “Hey, ok,” that most audiences are bound to give it.

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