Marnie the Forgetful Witch of the South uses a vampire like a puppet and busts herself out of King Bill’s holding Cell. She wants to be known as Antonia Maria Conchita Alonso now. After she busts out of jail, she wanders into Tara along the roadside and recruits her into her Wiccan Army. Antonia Maria Conchita Alonso is like a Witch Dictator, spouting rhetoric, preaching genocide… She can actually levitate though. That would get her a cult following anywhere.
Earlier, Tara had a fight with Pam that left Pam looking like one of those Twilight Zone pig people. It’s ok. Turns out all Pam needs is an extra strength wax job and some Vampire Botox…
Alcide gets baptized into the local redneck wolf pack. Then he and his bitch (Right? They’re Canines, right?) do a little peeping on Eric and Sookie smushing… It seemed at first as if that inspired the Kibbles n Bits Couple, as the next time we see them, THEY’RE the ones banging. But really it threw a monkey wrench at them as Debbie starts all crying and… well, I don’t know what happened then, I fast forwarded to the next scene once she started in with the tears.
Spying on Sookie and Eric wasn’t as sneaky as it sounds, the two of them did the beast with two backs thing over the river and through the woods and back to Grandma’s house. I was about to say it felt like a WEEK to me they’d been doin’ the deed, but I guess it actually was… Unfortunately, I guess screwing Sookie across half of Bon Temps didn’t make Eric any less of a wuss.
Bill should run for human government. Our government’s been screwing people over with bad, painful judgements for years. Seems like he was right in the end though, as the witches DID eventually cast their vampire sleepwalk spell.
Hoyt came to visit Jason. I wish he was visiting Siberia instead. Jason was in the middle of trying to push-up Jessica out of his system. Of course, that’s not easy. Jessica, meanwhile, comes to admit she doesn’t love Hoyt anymore. Hopefully that frees her up.
But not in the breaking free of her silver and dragging herself to the sun way… She BETTER be alive next week! Jason was on his way to save her, but he was tackled at the goal-line!
Jonesing Andy Bellefleur is gonna need detox. Arlene gave lil Evil Demon Baby a Dagobah style lift. He may not be Evil after all, maybe he just sees dead people. Lafayette sure does. And finally, I was wishing Sam would kill Tommy once and for all. Tommy annoys me.
What do you think, True Blood fans? Jessica’s got to survive, right? And for sure, Sam kills his brother this season, right? So he can “skin walk”?
Let me know what you think!