The 2012 FMR MAJOR Awards: The Worst Supporting Actress Nominees

Worst Supporting Actress Nominees

Boys and girls, it is my profound disappointment to present you with the Worst Supporting Actress Nominees for 2012. These were the ladies that weren’t the leads in their films, but they made you say “Egads!” anyways. The Worst Supporting Actresses of 2012.

Click through to see the offenders!

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jessica-bielJessica Biel
“Total Recall”

It’s not as if Rachel Ticotin left huge shoes to fill, but Jessica Biel’s Melina is certain to make audiences pine for the original. Or anyone else, for that matter. Stiff and inexpressive, Biel’s performance here is one of the big reasons that “Total Recall” came up lame. If Earth’s future depends on her as a revolutionary, we’re all in trouble. At least she fit right in with all the cheap, phony looking CGI.

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Chelsea HandlerChelsea Handler
“This Means War”

Handler plays the obnoxious, crude, sex-obsessed confidant to Reese Witherspoon in this year’s critically panned “This Means War”. I didn’t hate it as much as most, but she nearly single-handedly derailed it for me. Crude, lewd and obnoxious, Handler grated on my nerves each and every second she was onscreen. I honestly hope to never see her in a movie ever again. Seriously.
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dolly-partonDolly Parton
“Joyful Noise”

It’s not a good sign when you have to acknowledge your plastic surgeries via humor in your movie, lets start there. But aside from that, Dolly was just asked to show up and be “Aw Shucks” Dolly. There was no “acting” involved, she was just the country spun matriarch with down home advice for folks. She gets to sing and act sassy, and… be Dolly. Thing is, who’s looking forward to seeing that nowadays?

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RihannaRihanna
“Battleship”

Rihanna’s casting fits right in to “Battleship”‘s strategy of success through stupidity. She’s completely out of place as a naval weapons specialist, and further, they have her man enormous weapons that look as if they would knock her on her ass. As a result, every moment she’s onscreen comes across as laughable. Silly. Of course, everything else in “Battleship” was ludicrous, too, so in that regard, having her be the weapons expert works.
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sigourney-weaverSigourney Weaver
“The Cold Light of Day”

Weaver thinks a smirk is enough to qualify as “evil” in this bland collection of clichés. I almost wonder if she and Willis made a bet to see who could exert themselves the least in the course of their performances. In spite of having the larger role, I think Weaver compensates nicely by condescending the material a little more. Her performance is stale, uninspired and lifeless, much like the movie itself.
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There they are, folks. The lackluster ladies of 2012!

What do YOU think? Any of these ladies unworthy of the this particular dishonor? Are there any that you were hoping to see, but I left off?

Let us hear it!!

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74 thoughts on “The 2012 FMR MAJOR Awards: The Worst Supporting Actress Nominees

  1. I haven’t seen any of these movies and probably won’t but before I even opened the list I wondered if there would be Jessica Biel from Total Recall, and voila, first up she’s there! HAHA!
    Loved your write up of all the nominations though! Awesomeness!

    • :D

      Thanks Kim. I figure on these worst ofs lists, a lot of people will have had the good sense to skip them so I try to at least entertain by kicking them around in an enjoyable way. LOL

      And yes, Jessica Biel was terrible in Total Recall. Surprisingly though, I thought she did a good job in another terrible movie this year “Playing for Keeps”. None of that was on her, she held up her end of the deal. LOL

      • I’m just really not into Jessica Biel as an actress. Since my boyfriend isn’t either, we don’t really invest much time in her movies. Haha! I think the only movie I enjoyed that she was part of was The Illusionist but then it was because of Edward Norton that I liked it.

  2. I haven’t seen any of these either… but I’m completely unsurprised at Chelsea Handler’s inclusion. She is fundamentally incapable of acting. Even if you watch her talk show — my father does for some reason that’s beyond me — her unscripted moments are moderately amusing, but on anything that’s scripted, even down to the opening monologue, her delivery is absolutely incompetent.

  3. Biel Biel Biel it’s gotta be Biel!!! I could never in good conscience criticize Weaver and (I’m young so er) Chelsea Handler makes me laugh (in twenty second doses to be clear), I have no clue about Dolly Parton (I’m young did I mention that?), and Battleship was so bad it was good, and the last thing I was worried about was Rihanna’s acting chops. I was actually going to suggest the blond swimsuit model from that film, can’t remember her name, but at least Rihanna isn’t your typical damsel in distress heehee!

    Seriously just give Biel the f#%@ing award, she is so awful in everything she’s in gahhh!!!! But I won’t be insanely mad if she doesn’t win. She is nice to look at I suppose… ;)

    • Brooklyn Decker (The Battleship Blonde). She was awful too.

      And you’re right, I guess Rihanna is given a fight to fight…

      But in fairness, so was Biel. She was like future revolutionary, bringing down corruption against robot armies!! No? :D

      • The thing about Rihanna is that she’s got some sort of character. Even if she’s a bad actress, she makes you grin a little, and she’s certainly tomboyish and, I don’t know, just kind of cheeky about how silly this whole thing is. With Biel, there’s just nothing. I mean, nothing. I can’t get a single emotion out of her – which makes sense, since her probable plastic surgery has left her, well, plastic. Same for Decker. She’s so used of showing us her boobs that she doesn’t know what to do with her face once it finally has our attention, ;)

        And btw, fighting aliens is way more badass than fighting meany government men following orders and your ex-boyfriend’s fake wife who is still way hotter than you even when she’s evil and British and actually a vampire, and just come on…there’s too many fandoms, I can’t keep them all straight!!

  4. Hahh this is an easy one too. I am one of three people that had fun with Battleship and even I say Rihanna wasnt the worst thing on the screen and this was her debut. Now Sigourney, a veteran should know better than pull off the crap she did and phone it in like she was using string and tin cans!

    • You have an insightful analysis going on here. Rihanna certainly was ludicrous, but Weaver phoned hers in. (Like that old school tin can comparison…)

      How does one choose between the two schools of bad?

      This is what I face!!

      • Yes, decisions decisions! We just did our top and bottom 10 podcast for the year and it was not easy in a bumper crop year!

      • I’ll have to check that out. LOL. I bet Brian picked Anna Karenina somewhere in there… OOH wait. Better yet, did he put “The Avengers” in his botttom ten just to stir people up? LOL

        Now I’m definitely curious… :D

  5. Playing For Keeps is describe in more ways than one forme!! Here is how I would sum up the movie(here we go!!): Predictable, cliched, silly, weird, dissapointing, less then decent, but more than mediocre!! Uma Thurman=Razzies Anyone? I like Dennis Quaid(especially on Ellen), but in this movie, he was an obnoxious sexual greedy snot!!!
    Gerarld Butler= Has many times has he done movies like this?!? One answer-
    Too Many!!! A very blan perfor,amce!!
    Overall: Sometimes a little sweet, but sometimes tooo sweet and just a little bit humorous, but a really bland, predictable, cliched, repeatitive movie that earms a grade of a… generous and solid C+..okay how about a very generous(enough) grade of a C-?
    One actress brought a very predictable performance in this movie, but is not fault for why the movie is sooo bland and unorignal and almost terrible..and that is
    Jessica Biel..oh.. And I almost forgot.. Catherine Zeta-Jones!! Not a bad performance, but a why-do-these-good-actors-and-actress-pick-and-star-in-very-bland-unorignal-and-prredictable-movies? type of a performance!!
    Ha Ha!!
    Pretty Good!!
    Imighht have an interest in Cold Light Of Day though, but with terrible reviews from critics amd audiences, i am still not sure if I should want to see this as Netfilx DVD rental!! What do you think? Is it worth watching for 90. Minutes by a Netflix delivery rental or not?
    Otherwise, good picks!!!

    • No… I’d pretty much stay away from Cold Light of Day. I’ve done two posts so far on worst supporting actors/actresses and that movie represents in both, Bebe.

      I wish I could say why these talented people take this garbage. Maybe it has something to do with Package deals. In other words, when there’s a part these guys want, the studios make them sign on to do another one they have no interest in as well. Otherwise theyd never get name actors/actresses to do them. :(

      Uma Thurman would have been a perfect selection for this category. Not sure which one of the nominees I’d have bumped, but she would have fit right in!

      • Please call me Brian, that’s just my just part of my contact(for emails) name!!

        I know!! Maybe it’s just for the $!! Haha!!! Dennis Quaid is a hoot on Ellen, I will admit that, but otherwise, what else has Dennis Quaid got going for himself?!?!? Sure, he was in the decent, but sometimes boring football movie, The Express and he stars in Vegas, which I really have no interest in seeing since I am missing out on the shows, I might as well just lose interest!! Your movie pal, Brian

        Sent from my iPad Mini(A Mini Version of an iPad)

  6. This Means War wasn’t THAT BAD for ME as for what the critics and what you have said!! I have to. Say a B-
    Silly dumb mindless fun!!
    Though, yah, it was kind of stupid too!!
    Chris Pine and Tom Hardy were pretty funny and quite good too(in my opinion)!!
    I liked to see a lot more from both of them!! Except Star Trek 2-never have seen them and probably never will see them-they just don’t interest all that much!!! Though the preview for Star Trek 2 looks okay-still probably won’t see it though!!!
    Anything else besides Star Trek I would be interested in from any, or from both of these talented actors!!

    • I didnt bash that movie either. In all honesty, that’s one of the few movies so far represented by either of these worst acting categories that I thought was ok. I think I gave it a B range grade too.

      Handler though. Good lord, she was grating. I thought she was painful, buddy, ouch….

      Pine and Hardy, of course, are both good as you say…Hardy especially!

      • Hello Fogs!! At least there’s one thing we have in common(well I guess two things, or three): 1: we both decently liked This Means War and gave it a B range grade! 2: we are totally excited for the Oscar nominations to come out and the Oscars itself too (on Feb. 24th) 3: We both really never knew this, but we might be excited for the Razzies too!!

        A few questions about the Oscars(if you don’t mind): 1. Who did you want to host the Oscars? Anyone in particular? Was Seth “Raunchy Ted” McFarlane a good or at least a decent or an okay enough choice 4 u? 2. Who are you voting to get nominated for: Picture, Actor, Actress, Director, Supporting Actor and Actress, Original and Adapted Screenplay? Animation, Visual, Cinematography, and Original Score? Any prediction winners too? 3. Doing anything new or special to get ready for the Oscars this year? 4. Who would be a good Oscar host for any year? 5. Ready for the Oscars? A non-related Oscar question: Are you ready for the new Die Hard movie?!? I am!! What are your thoughts about the new one soon to come out? Do you like it or do you mind or not that it will be released on V-Day? Please answer my questions as soon as you can!! Thanks!! Your-movie-pal-whose-just-excited-about-the-Oscar-nominations-and-the-Oscar-awards celebration-itself-and-of-the-new-die hard-movie-as-you-hopefully-are, Brian D.

        Sent from my iPad Mini(A Mini Version of an iPad)

      • Yeah… Im not gonna go through all of that Brian, sorry. I have my hands full keeping up with comments here And writing the rest of these posts I have to post the next few weeks, then Im a few hours off from recording my podcast, too!

        Stick around, my “Best Of” picks can pretty much qualify for who I’m rooting for come Oscar time…

      • It is okay!! First off, it’s BRIAN!! Sorry!! Second-as long as I get to know your Oscar picks sooner or later(hopefully b4 thursday- Oscar Nomination Day!! Yeah!!!), I will okay!! Thanks 4 responding!! My favorite movies of 2012 so far(zero dark thirty was technically a 2012-limited release movie, even though it won’t B released until Friday where I live, I still hope it meets my expectations!! Even with the critical and Oscar buzz circling around the web, I hope it doesn’t disappoint and hopefully soon make my top 10 best movies of 2012(hopefully at the #1 spot of my list-just like Richard Roper’s list of the best movies of 2012-which you can view at RichardRoeper.com !! Sorry, I can’t give you the link, but you can certainly go to the website if you wish! A very smart and terrific reviewer who is certainly better than RogerEbert!!! Happy Oscars and good luck with the predictions and voting on Thursday!! Your-movie-fan-who-is-excited-4-the-Oscar-Nominations-and-excited-to-vote-for-them-when-they-come-out-on-Thursday-and-excited-for-the-Oscar’s-celebration-on-Februaury 24th- movie pal, BRIAN D.

        Sent from my iPad Mini(A Mini Version of an iPad)

  7. Hurray! I’m 0 for 10 on the Worsts so far! Which probably just means that one of my favorite performances is going to show up in the Lead categories and piss me off. Haha!

    But seriously, thanks for taking the bullet and seeing these. I’m actually liking your worsts much more than the annual Razzies, where they tend to just pick on the same people over and over again.

    • You know, its funny you bring this up. I think this will interest you cause I know you’re fascinated by the other side of the coin.

      But the discussion forums over at the Razzies (which I lurk at in order to ensure I’m covering all the bases) just wants to hammer the same people again and again like you say! Its all they do, LOL. I’m like, there are worse actors! And Actors! Lay off! LOL. It is what it is, but its frustrating, and you hit the nose right on the head.

      Though Im sure there’s bound to be SOME overlap… LOL

      • The same thing happens in Oscar forums, with a few folks keeping their favorites in the conversation long after they should be there. And with the Razzies it’s even funnier because the worst film of the year is probably something that none of those voters even saw, because it never even made it as far as their local cineplex.

      • Roger that on the Razzies… I noticed they have a post listing all of the year’s movies, and which ones are under discussion… I’ve already harped on my choice for the Worst Picture of the Year, and they had it on their list of all the movies… but not as one being discussed. So they’re aware of it, but apparently they’d rather focus on stuff that’s high-profile but not necessarily all that bad by comparison.

      • Well. You have to strike a balance somewhere too, I definitely deal with that myself. I’m sure I could find worse performances even that these, but you have to at least have a certain level of recognition involved or the discussion ends very quickly. LOL. As it is, most people havent seen many (if any) of the worst ofs…

      • Very true. But I often got the sense that the Razzies weren’t really trying, even before it became a public vote thing. Now, of course, it’s just pure bandwagoning.

    • Its a close call. LOL. They were both pretty rough on audiences. :D

      I dont know that I can recommend Total Recall for anything other than killing your curiousity, but Battleship is so bad its good. Its one of those movies thats so laughably bad you may just have fun with it. :D

  8. If Dolly had plastic surgeries, then she should sue her doctor. She looked terrible. So I’ll go with Dolly, if you’ll beg my parton.

    • Ahhhahah. I see what you did there. :D

      And yeah, she’s totally had work done, but it was a while ago… which is why she looks terrible. Not saying that she should update it. Its just that thats the consequences of tampering around, whatever you change doesnt age the same as the rest of it and then you look awful. LOL :(

  9. I’m pretty sure the ladies of Iron Sky are neglected here, but I’m not positive since I haven’t actually seen it yet. But I remember, from trailers, there being a Sarah Palin doppleganger who seemed particularly uninspired. Still will probably see it, though — I mean, Nazis from the moon, how can I not?

    • Yeah… well, that didnt even open over here did it? I checked Box Office Mojo, it says 8 theatres. :( Gotta stay with stuff bigger than that!

      Sounds like a fun enough B Movie candidate though :D

      • Well, that explains why I’m just recently hearing about it via interweb and movie stores. I feel better. That’s the kind of movie that I certainly would have tried to see in a theater and was sad I didn’t hear about it till too late.

        As for the ladies you’ve mentioned here, I think I’ll go with Dolly Parton. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen her actually act. She’s just herself in *every* movie. And while I haven’t seen This Means War, it sounds like your problem with Handler isn’t with her acting so much as with her character, so fault the screenwriter for that one. She can’t be held responsible for crappy character concept.

      • Ohhhh. I don’t know about that. I mean, that’s always the case, just as all the “Best of”s to come this week all landed great roles… They still had to pull them off right?

        Well, the inverse is true here, too. They might of been handed crap parts, but they did nothing to salvage them.

        In Handler’s case particularly, her character WAS bad, but so was she. I have a feeling that’s her persona, which is either why they got it or why they wrote it for her… In which case, as was apparent, there wasn’t a lot of acting going on.

  10. I was hoping The Cold Light of Day would be good. Still haven’t seen it.

    One of these days, I’ll get around to Battleship. I think it’s about due. Peter Berg should do Hancock 2. Just thought I’d throw that out there.

    Since the only movie on your list that I’ve seen is Total Recall, I’ll gladly put my support behind Biel’s performance. I have to say, though, I think Ticotin is pretty awesome in the original.

      • Yea, I actually bought her as her character. In the remake, I didn’t buy anything I was looking at, really. I really, really hated the scene that tried to do what the doctor/pill scene in the original did.

      • Worst scene of the year. Telling you. It almost earned Bookeem Woodbine a worst supporting actor nom, just for that. Seriously. I had him on my list all year. LOL

        Terrible remake injustice. Terrible. You’re 100% right.

      • To me, the worst thing about the movie is how it just totally brushed all the mystery as to whether the entire adventure is real or not under the rug. It just decided for us that it’s all real and went with that. At least I didn’t see a single thing casting any doubt whatsoever on the sanity of Quaid.

      • No, no you’re right. But I have to say that almost plays second fiddle to the elimination of Mars and mutants. One three boobed chick… with no explanation why… is all we got to reflect that entire element of the old film. Terrible. :(

      • lmao, yea. There aren’t any mutants in the remake, sooooo…three boobs? What? Was that supposed to be plastic surgery or something? I guess it could be a fetish in the future, who knows.

  11. Hi, Fogs and company:

    You seem to have divined some serious, stay upwind, Weapons Grade Badness here. Earlier noting Bruce Willis and his role as the pater spy in “The Cold Light of Day’. And now noting Sigourney Weaver’s worn and weary, evil smirky smirkiness in the same flick.

    And here I thought you’d opt for Megan Fox in ‘This is 40′.

    • Nah, as far as Im concerned, her role there was just to play “Hot distracting Tramp for aging husband” I thought she did it well! LOL Kudos Megan!

      Cold Light of Day was such garbage. Wasnt it? Ugh. [Head shake]

      These are all bad, but I do have a special bitterness at Cold Light for some reason. LOL

  12. Jessica Biel TANKS Everything She’s Associated With.
    Drives Me Crazy When She Gives That Damned Look.
    You Know It.
    It’s In Everything She’s Ever Done (that I’m aware of).
    That Look Of “O.M.G. I Don’t Know What I’m Doing So I’m Just Going To Stand Here With My Mouth Slightly Gaped And I’ll Just Breathe Slightly Breathy And Pouty.”
    She Makes The Face, I Roll My Eyes.
    Happens Every Time.
    Ms. Biel Gets My Vote, Dude.
    Fo SHO! :D
    -B.

  13. Oh man this is too funny!
    I thought I was the only one that noticed the irritating Chelsea Handler. I wrote in my review and I quote…

    “…and I wished Chelsea Handler [Trish] would just shut the hell up.”

    • :D

      I wonder if anyone DIDNT though, right? I mean she WAS that bad, wasn’t she?

      I cant believe the Razzies didn’t pick her! Ughck…. seriously. I shouldnt even start. :(

      Thanks for the suport nonetheless, I’m glad other people saw the same thing I saw. LOL :D

  14. I don’t even blame Biel for her Melina not being so great. There was NO character development at all in favor of special effects and fights and chase scenes. I blame the directing for that one.

    Dolly just plays variations of herself in every movie she has done. All her characters seem the same. She is not an actress and she should have been advised not to try.

    Rihanna’s character in Battleship was so flat that anyone could have played the part and there would have been no difference. The only point of the character seemed to be saying a single line that, when translated into English, made no sense. And I can’t even remember the line now.

    As for the other two, didn’t see the films so I have no opinion.

    • Biel didnt exactly do anything to elevate her character, either. She’s a pretty bland actress, so it all comingled into on big bowl of tasteless porridge there. :(

      Rihanna was out of place there. Miscast. It was stunt casting, and it was so blatant that it stood out like a sore thumb. Then on top of it, she… wasn’t very good. She wasnt believeable IN the role, and then she didnt do that good with it. She helped contribute to the laughable mess that was Battleship. :(

      • Well, battleship was based on a fairly simple board game. I was anticipating a laughable movie. I pretty much got what I expected and Rihanna was the worst thing about the movie. I enjoyed it simply because it was exactly what I expeced. I just wish someone, anyone, else was in the part. Maybe not anyone. Could you imagine someone like Zooey D in it? While she is a good actress (never seen her t.v. show but like every movie I’ve seen her in thus far) I think she would have been more out of place than Rihanna.

      • I forgot to say that I was expecting a lot worse from Biel. So even thought she didn’t bring anything to the part and was a bit flat, she was far better than I thought she would be. Which is why I wonder, if there was more time devoted to developing that character and the director put a little effort into directing her, could she have done better? So I’m giving her a little bit of leaway here.

  15. Biel all the way. Saying that I’ve only seen This Means War (Handler was just about palatable for me.) but Biel deserves to be punished for all her acting sins. Sorry, “acting” sins.

    • LOL. The Razzies nominated her too. :D

      She does have a long litany of poor acting, no? She fit right in to that junky Total Recall remake unfortunately. That was just about the calibre of that flick.

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