Immortals

I had been here before.

Unsuspecting. No particular anticipation.

But I’m a veteran, experienced. Getting grizzled now even.

So when that first swell started… I noticed it right away. The first visuals, I mean, right from the opening shot. I was like “Ooh. Garish.” The dialogues starts. Mickey Rourke sets a priest on fire. There was a different taste in the air. I sat straighter in my seat.

This was¬†“Awesomely Awful”¬†territory. And big surf at that.

I geared up. Headed out. The fight scenes started and a parade of people in silly looking costumes flatlined dialogue about Gods and mortals. “Get me out there, get me out there” was all I could think. This was a monster. “Theseus” fights a “Minotaur” that’s really just a big dude in a barbed wire bull mask. I tweeted madly, laughed out loud openly. This was legendary stuff! “Get me out there get me out there!”

Little did I know what I was facing.

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Rise of the Planet of the Apes

“Born Free!! As free as the wind blows…

As free as the Grass gr—” Oh shit. Sorry. I’ve gotta stop doing that!

Rise of the Planet of the Apes was an excellent flick! I was totally surprised how much I liked it. It tells the story of how the planet fell to the apes in the first place. And is probably a little more plausible than just “There was a talking circus pet in Ricardo Montalban’s circus”.

Here’s the unexpected thing that the previews don’t really show you though. The Apes aren’t the villains in this movie… they’re the heroes.

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