Quick! Memorize these numbers!
Now. That’s a trick question. The correct answer should have been “Why the %#$& would I do that?” But that doesn’t stop the Chinese Mafia in “Safe” from utilizing a little girl with Rain Man level math skills from holding their most sensitive data. When she becomes the object of an all out gang war, there’s only one man who can protect her…
Jason Statham plays Luke Wright, a down on his luck cage fighter who can’t even take a dive correctly. When he fails to throw a fight, he earns the wrath of the Russian Mob, who in turn kill his girlfriend and frame him for doing it. Despondent, Wright contemplates committing suicide by throwing himself in front of an oncoming subway train… until he sees a little girl hiding from pursuers (speaking Russian). His decision to help her takes his mind off of suicide, and thus he considers her to have saved his life. Coupled for his hatred for the Russians, this results in Wright risking his life in order to save the girl.
The girl turns out to be a human supercomputer of sorts, and the Chinese mob have used her to store an encrypted number. When the Russians attempt to kidnap her, you wind up having two rival gangs that Wright has to contend with in order to keep the girl safe. Add in the fact that every cop in this film is crooked, and the police essentially serve as a third faction. Which gives Statham’s Wright plenty of bodies to beat on.
The plot here is overly complicated for a movie that revolves around Statham beating people up. There’s numerous interconnections and backstories between the players - including Wright, who of course, is more than just a cage fighter. All of it is delivered via exposition, too. Characters taking a break from beating each other up to go on long-winded spiels explaining motivations and past events. (Sigh. Eyeroll) And the end objective – the object that the “Numbers” eventually lead to is as hackneyed and trite as they come. At times, this movie reminded me of the stupid action movies of the 80s we’ve been talking about so much here lately. Plots and characters so bad they can literally give you a headache of you try to take them seriously.
But that’s ok. It’s completely understood that the only reason anyone would ever watch this movie is to watch Jason Statham wailing on people, and the movie delivers that aplenty. Car chases, gun fights, a ludicrous sequence on top of a subway train, fist fights, etc… this movie delivers your typical quotient of action movie violence, and occasionally does it in a clever way. There were some well choreographed segments and some original moves, including one technique involving a subway-car pole that I hope never happens to me. LOL. Statham is at his burly, brusque best here, and if that’s what you’re going to see, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed.
All others be leery of paying money for this movie directly in any fashion.